Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Love Your Enemy

I was sitting at church on Sunday listening to a message, that I've heard a hundred times. "Love your Enemy". A message I have known about since forever....But since, I truly don't have "enemies" I usually do the 'ya-I'm-listening-but-not-really-hearing-you' thing.

But...Somehow, this message hit me differently this time.  Usually when people think of who their "enemies" are....They think of people they hate.  People who have hurt them in some unforgivable way.

Sure - I have people in my life who have hurt me...But, I began to think deeper-

What about THINGS?

Things and circumstances have hurt me far more than people.

I have something in my life that has caused hurt, bitterness, resentment, anger, pain, destructiveness and true hatefulness.  So- I think it qualifies as my enemy.

Neurofibromatosis IS MY ENEMY.  And loving it, is impossible.  Or is it?

When I began this blog 4 yrs ago...I truly despised NF.  My blog back then was called "Life in the Big Shitty"....and I blogged ranted about how horrible it was to have NF....and how my life was anything but good.

Hate doesn't feel good.  I never walked away from a blog post back then, thinking.."WOW...that was great...I hope someone reads it..."   The blog back then, was an outlet for how frustrated I felt.  Now... outlets for anger are great...Everybody needs them....But if those outlets are destructive...You will only continue to spiral downwards.

And that's where I was.  ROCK BOTTOM!

The thing about rock bottom....The only way OUT....is UP!

"Thriving with Neurofibromatosis" has NOT made me LOVE NF.  But it has made me accept it.  Thriving has given me a purpose...And I LOVE THAT!


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