Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Dinner is burning, kids are screaming-the house a mess! I slide down the kitchen counter and sat on the cherrio scattered floor. I layed my head in my hands, I begin to cry. "Why me, Lord?"
I hear a CRASH coming from the living room, followed by crying. I know it's bad, when anything is followed by crying! I look up to the ceiling, as if I was waiting for God to appear and help me through this. No such luck.
"Moooommmy, Riker knocked over the shelf, and Brooklyn is stuck!" I close my eyes, take a long deep breath and slowly slide myself back up the counter. I pass the over-flowing boiling water on the stove and peek my head around the corner. I saw two small eyes, looking at me from under a mound of dvd's. "Mom, help, Mom help me", my 2 yr old daughter, Brooklyn says to me. Riker, stands back, trying to hide from me, as my eyes shifted to him. "She wanted to watch Spongebob, mom", he says to me. "I tried to get it for her."
I take a deep breath and begin to rescue my child. I free Brooklyn and she’s off running down the hallway. "Spongebob Mom, I found it!" Riker pulls the dvd from the mountain, on the floor. "Yes you did, let's watch it!" The excitement that my children show, for strange things like a yellow sponge who wears pants and a tie, I will never understand.
Children just want to be loved and paid attention to. They need acknowledgemnt and encouragement, then just watch what they give back to you. They will amaze you in the way they see such good in life.
I remember back in May, when I took Rachel for her MRI, we strolled through the halls of the Children’s Hospital and saw many many very sick kids. They weren’t sad though, they were laughing and playing---living in the moment.
That’s the way I am trying to live my life, and raise my family. Focusing on the NOW, helps me stay positve. It helps me get my children through a tough time. It helps ME knowing that that are happy and stable…even though they could be facing a potentially scary diagnoses.
And as I go through my own tests, scans, pokes and imaging, I think of them. It is my children who get me through the dark and scary times. I know, that whatever it is, I may be facing, I will have them to come home to.
I know that the stressful days, when the dinner gets burnt, the washer breaks, the toilet floods, the laundry doesn’t get done, and the hamsters escape; will try to get me to give up……I will remember to take a deep breath and know, that the stress in life is only temporary.
I choose to never give up. I choose to set an example for my children. I choose to leave behind a legacy of strength and hope. What will you choose?